Launching momOS 7.0!

Despite living halfway around the world, I couldn’t pass up the chance to be there in person for my mom’s 70th birthday. After all, reaching version 7.0 is no small feat! Eric and I both gave speeches that aimed to blend humor with heartfelt appreciation. It was a night, and in true mom fashion, a few days spent celebrating. The party was filled with laughter, eccentric personalities and affectionate eye-rolls as we navigated the quirky metaphors and analogies. Being there to celebrate the achievements and unconventional methods of our brainy mom was a joy, especially as we all shared stories of the unique “patches” and “updates” she’s brought into each of our lives.

For everyone who could not attend, I hope this provides a small glimpse into what incredible person she is.

Good evening and welcome.

As some of you may have heard I have termed this mom’s 7.0 release!

Continuing on that theme and in recognition of the many engineers here tonight, I thought it was fitting to liken mom to an Operating System or an OS.

For those less computer savvy, an Operating System supports a computer’s basic functions such as scheduling tasks, executing applications, and controlling peripherals such as printers.

If some of you are still confused it is understandable as the branding for this OS has been all over the map. Most commonly referred to as Denise, this system has also been known to go by mom, Mrs. Smack, Dedee, Mrs Zena. But given this OS was laser focused on producing the highest quality output we can understand and overlook the lack of brand consistency. For today, I will simply refer to her in the style of macOS or iOS, as momOS

Version 1.0 of momOS was tough, which made getting to version 2.0 even tougher!

There were very limited resources for version 1.0 and being orphaned at 16 meant that version 2.0 had to be rewritten completely on her own – before the time of google or AI! Nonetheless focused on output, she got herself through college, graduating as one of very few female electrical engineers in the 70’s. This success was critical in reworking momOS’s Kernal (i.e her Core), changing the trajectory and providing the platform for many successful future versions.

Now like any good momOS, she understood that garbage in meant garbage out. So when one of the subsystems (a.k.a. her children) was severely sick, in the early 80’s, she took it upon herself to ensure that the entire eco system (i.e. the family) ate an incredibly strict all organic, unprocessed, preservative-free diet. Her subsystems didn’t even know what butter was until it was finally introduced by a “legacy system” (a.k.a. grandma). While this pure energy source undoubtedly helped improve performance and assisted what medical professionals still call a “miracle” recovery, it did lead to several interesting caloric inputs, such as miso soup with tofu at swim meets while other subsystems got hot chocolate and marshmallows.

With all systems healthy and functioning the stand alone momOS returned its attention to maximizing performance and embracing unorthodox development techniques – teaching her 3 subsystems independence, integrity, critical-thinking and to always open our casing (i.e home) and share our resources with other systems in need of patches or repairs.

Although documentation and communication is critically important to any code, it often gets deprioritized, lapses or deteriorates over time. The eco system supported by the momOS was no different. At one point the communication was so strained, momOS in her infinite practical wisdom sat her 7, 12 and 14 year old subsystems down and put us through myers-briggs testing, so we could better understand where our communication was flawed and start the process of rewriting our protocols.

With her laser focus on efficiency and output momOS was able to manage a second miracle. Through intensive programming, reboots and in my case several hardware (ie. cars and clothes) iterations momOS enabled (or brainwashed) all 3 subsystems to graduate from the Colorado School of Mines. Her proudest achievement!

Now with free energy from not having to support her subsystems and thus retiring her most core momOS function, she has been able to put her full efforts towards the release of a global, geographic information systems. Although this upgrade has come with a slight deterioration of her communication system… as I am sure each of you have experienced in jumbled text, typos and incorrect send/receive information.

Nonetheless, when traveling the world at a breakneck pace, visualizing, analyzing and editing each experience to add to the momOS body of knowledge, there is little processing power left to worry about communication consistency or accuracy.

Throughout its multitude of releases, patches and fixes the momOS has proved to be resilient, cutting edge, focused, generous and a true miracle worker.

Mom thank you for the energy, programming and processes you have instilled in each of us.

Today, we celebrate your 70th year on the market. We recognise not only the versions you have managed but the impact you have had and will continue to have on the multitude of systems you support.

Please everyone raise your glass in recognition of the past 70 years well spent and the official launch of Denise or momOS 7.0!